Wednesday, March 2, 2022

Common Patterns in/of Whites

 

Common Patterns in/of Whites

This was one of our handouts in the current Allyship Training this Saturday, February 26, 2022  Enlightening exercise.

Directions: review these common group dynamics:

a.     Check-off any dynamics which you have observed or heard about.

b.     Make a note next to the different dynamics that you have personally participated in.

Some/Many Whites Tend to (consciously and unconsciously):

1. believe they have “earned” what they have, rather than acknowledge the extensive unearned advantages they receive; claim that if people of color just worked harder…

2. not notice the daily indignities that people of color experience; deny and rationalize them away with PLEs (perfectly logical explanations)

3. work to maintain the status quo and protect the advantages and privileges they receive

4. believe that white cultural norms, practices and values are superior and better

5. internalize negative stereotypes and believe that whites are smarter and superior to POC

6. want people of color to conform and assimilate to white cultural norms and practices

7. accept and feel safer around people of color who have assimilated and are “closer to white”

8. blame people of color for the barriers and challenges they experience; believe that if they “worked harder” they could “pull themselves up by their bootstraps”

9. believe that people of color are not competent and are only hired/promoted to fill quotas

10. interrupt and talk over people of color

11. resent taking direction from a person of color

12. dismiss and minimize frustrations of people of color and categorize the person raising issues  as militant, angry, having an “attitude,” working their agenda, not a team player...

13. focus on their “good intent” as whites, rather than on the negative impact of their behavior

14. focus on how much progress we have made, rather than on what still needs to change 

15. want people of color to “get over it” and move on quickly

16. get defensive when people of color express frustration with racism

17. “walk on eggshells” and act more distant and formal with people of color

18. live segregated from people of color and rarely develop authentic cross-racial relationships 

19. exaggerate the level of intimacy they have with individual people of color

20. fear that they will be seen and “found out” as a racist, having racial prejudice

21. focus on individualism and refuse to acknowledge cultural and institutional racism 

22. pressure and punish whites who actively work to dismantle racism to conform and collude with white racism; criticize, gossip about, and find fault with white change agents

23. expect people of color to be the “diversity expert” and address racism as their unpaid job

24. minimize, ignore, and discount the competencies and contributions of people of color 

25. rephrase and reword the comments of people of color

26. ask people of color to repeat what they have just said

27. assume the white person is in charge/the leader; assume people of color are in service roles

28. rationalize away racist treatment of people of color as individual incidents or the result of something the person of color did/failed to do

29. dismiss racism when shared by people of color with comments such as: That happens to me too...You’re too sensitive...That happened because of _____, it has nothing to do with race!

30. judge a person of color as over-reacting and too emotional when they are responding to the cumulative impact of multiple recent racist incidents 

31. accuse people of color of “playing the race card” whenever they challenge racism; instead of exploring the probability that racist attitudes and beliefs are operating

32. if racially confronted by a person of color, shut down and focus on what to avoid saying or doing in the future, rather than engaging and learning from the interaction

33. look to people of color for direction, education, coaching on how to act and what not to do

34. compete with other whites to be “the good white:” the best ally, the friend of people of color

35. aggressively confront other white people and distance yourself from your own racist patterns

36. seek approval, validation, and recognition from people of color

37. if confronted by a person of color, view it as an “attack” and focus on HOW they engaged  me, not my original comments or behaviors

38. disengage if feel any anxiety or discomfort; remain silent in discussions of race and racism

39. avoid confronting other whites on their racist attitudes and behaviors

40. when trying to help people of color, feel angry if they don’t enthusiastically appreciate you 

41. believe there is one “right” way or “fit”, meaning “my way” or the “white way”

Program Guest Speaker May 15th

On May 15th, our guest speakers were Barbara Miller and Adilene Calderone of Friendship Diversion Services.  This was the second of our prog...